Unretirement

unretirement…And so here I come thundering out of retirement for one more column.

Some of you may recall your great dismay at my recent announcement of my impending retirement, and some (it is becoming increasingly evident) definitely don’t. While it is still difficult and painful for me to admit that there was actually a lot less mail (or comment of any kind, really) generated by this event than I had hoped, that hasn’t stopped me from reconsidering my decision. My wife, the tantalizingly incandescent, blindingly mod Mrs. K, has prayed with me on the matter many times (or certainly would have if both of us weren’t such confirmed life-long heathens), and reminded me more than once that we could sure use the money -yet the answer has been long in coming.

Still, I felt a decision had to be made, lest scores of angry readers rise up as one against us, anxious to bludgeon us with their crude cudgels and spears. (I’ve always hated spears. If someone asked, what is the way you’d not like to die worst? I would say, I would not want to get speared; second would be having my face eaten alive by fire ants; and third, I think, would be natural death/old age, which sounds like it’s going to take forever -in fact, I might rather have my face eaten alive by fire ants.)

Anyway, so, my decision is, seeing as how no one disagreed with me about my decision to retire, I kind of took that as support for -and, more importantly, trust and faith in -my ability to run things well here at the column. What you have taught me, my faithful readers, through your complete lack of any reaction whatsoever to what I thought was really quite a sad and semi-historic announcement, was that you really trust where I’m going with the column. You like me! You really, really like me! The feeling of affirmation is indescribable.

And that, coupled with the fact that I totally forgot that I had retired for the next two weeks and kept writing anyway by mistake (which is exactly the kind of sign you’re looking for when pondering retirement), has convinced me that it is time to return at last to my beloved Krepe de la Kape, where I hope to write until the end of my days, or yours (preferably yours, actually -I hate the idea of me dying.) Boy, it sure feels good to be back at the old place; it’s just the same as I remembered it!

So, it sure seems like there’s getting to be a lot of people down here again, and I hate to say it, but it’s happening right around the same time it happened last year, right around end of June – beginning of July, and I think we’re beginning to see the beginnings of some kind of pattern. There’s so much traffic! Man oh man -you can’t even go to the store! It’s always right when it gets hot, too. Heck, we ought to start charging more this time of year -I’ll bet we’d get it!

You know what else? If I ever do retire, I’ll bet Florida would be a great place to do it. Don’t tell anyone about this one, though – the Mrs. and I want it all to ourselves!

By the way, you might notice that ever since I came back from retirement, I’ve been using a lot more exclamation marks! I hope you like them -I think they’ve given the column sort of a younger, more exciting look -and zesty!! I think in the weeks to come, you’ll be seeing a lot of improvements around here; or, if not here, somewhere else.!

In further entertainment news, we were able to ascertain last week that there is indeed a method for obtaining refunds for tickets still held for a handful of film showings at the Provincetown Film Festival that had to canceled. I’m told that most festival-goers were magnanimous about these mishaps, preferring that the money go to what is certainly a most worthy cause (as I’ve said many times, the wife and I are big fans of the fest). Still, those who lean towards greed and revenge will be delighted to know that they are most welcome to either call 508 349 0578 and hit *1; or to go on-line at piff2002@attbi.com to exact their pint of blood (we also enjoy a nice pint of blood every now and again.)

My friend Link Montana (aka Bruce Maclean) informs me that he’s almost completed a new album of instrumentals, and that he’s also doing a weekly gig at the Claddagh on Rt. 28 in Harwich, with drummer Rick Lemont and bassist Jay Cournoyer, every Sunday all summer (except July 14.) Coincidentally, Jay’s old cohort in the High Kings, Cliff Letsche, also has a regular Sunday afternoon gig, with singer Krista DeLude at the Crown and Anchor in Provincetown.

And the never-missable Zoe Lewis, who recently won yet another award at the Kerrville Folk Festival, turns up tomorrow night (Saturday, June 29th) at the Duck Creek Tavern in Wellfleet, and the next night (Sunday, the 30th) at Esther’s in P’town, where she’ll also be performing most Sundays, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays throughout the summer…!!!

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